- Its Early In The Morning In A Monday Afternoon You Are In Your Mid Twenties And Have A Significant Other Named Nicole 1 (252.34 KiB) Viewed 47 times
party. What do you do? 1) agree to go 2) persist that your not feeling well and not going make it 1) you agreed to go to the party even though you're not much of a social person but your doing it for Nicole and you really like to see her again. Seeing her again will help you feel better but you just hope there wont be any case of her dealing with your social anxiety. So you pack a Bag and head to the party. You see people hanging out on the porch and you feel like your chest tighten but you try to suck it up. You find Nicole chating with the birthday girl, and she immediately lightens up when she sees you. A random person taps her shoulder, she turns around to you and apologize and let you know that she has to do something. She hands you a drink and gives you a kiss on the cheek before leaving. As you look around, you don't recognize anyone.. 1) cling to the back wall and wait for your girlfriend to come back 2) Desite Nicole begging you to go, you tell her that that you can't go regrardless of you feeling to sick. You felt her expression with sigh that she let out knowing that you let her down.. She hopes that you feel better and and hopes to see next week or soon... you apologize and tell her that you love her and that you promise to hang out next week, She sounded distracted by something and distant and she saids her goodnights and hangs up. You spent the rest of the night beating yourself for letting her down, so you left a few apologetic text and when you didn't get any reply you felt so forgotten. 1) You make way to a clear spot in the back and lean against it in your mind this always feels alot more secure then standing in the middle. You try to see if you can see anyone you know or your partner but nothing. Not sure what to do, you start to worry thinking that everyone looking at you thinking your a creep looking at everyone. Your partner returns and you spend the rest of the night with Nicole. At the end of the night, you were falling asleep with you with your girlfriend in your arm, she thanks you once again for coming, thinking that you wouldn't come, but was supried that you managed to come. She said it lovingly but you're not quite sure how you feel about it. Next day, Your mother comes over unexpectly because she feels like she has seen you enough. While the two of you were having a conversation you feel like shes judging you. She notices and brings up that you haven't been yourself lately-pointing out the pile of dirty dishes and how you haven't visted her nor called. She presses you on asking you if you're having trouble at work or with Nicole. You began to feel very battered by her sudden pressing. Also feeling uncomfortable by her questions, you want to tell her how you REALLY been feeling but you're not sure yourself. Knowing that all is the same you can't deny that as of lately you been drained and that you don't feel like your HERE. What do you do? 1) try to be honest with her anyways 2) tell her that everything FINE 1) You try to tell your mother on how your feel, Trying to find the right words to say on how you feel like trying to untangle christmas lights, searching for the dead bulb in the cluttered mess. You noticed that shes watching you intently and audibly sighs before you can clear say anything. As she talks shes not mad nor spiteful but you try to explain that your not getting anywhere. In the mist of you trying to say what you had in your mind you choke on the very words you wanted to say and you give up on trying to push the subject. You accept the advice and the conversation drifts on. After she leaves, you crawl to bed and begin to stare at the ceiling. 2) you let her know that that everything is ok and thank her for worrying . Hopefully with your tone was convinving enough to convince her as you see her lips slightly open ready to say something but she grabs her phone out of her phone. You keep having your small talk with her and you realize that those who express concern for you, You tend to say that you're OK and you tell yourself that you really ARE ok but are you also wonder if you're trying to convice them or youself that youre really ok...
Next day, You hear your doorbell ringing, so you get up and see its your coworker Austin. It was slightly awkward seeing him here mosity because both of you don't talk to one another as often. He gets right to the point asking if i want a cat? it took a while to process what was going on and you try to picture a cat around your apartment as he continues to give you the cat but you don't have any to set up for a kitten. You feel like your getting guilt tripped but you give a hard consideration.what should you do.. 1) become the cat owner 2)deny the offer 1) you take the kitten and began to worry about the new reponsibility you have to handle and hope you dont make the poor kitten suffer So you began to researching cat care online. You look at the small terrified black and white cat and remember to leave her alone so he can get use to the environment. You noticed that he been hiding and hissing at you thinking that he wouldn't like you but after a couple days you gain his trust and began walking and sleeping with you. While hanging out with the kitten you saw a ad for therapy and considered on going but to scared to go. What will you do? 2) You decide that you didn't want the cat even through the guilt trips and rebuttals of excuses that you couldn't own a animal in your apartment. Austin gives up and thanks you anyways and is off. As you close the door you felt the emptiness in your apartment and felt the guilt if he would put the kitten to a shelter just because you felt that you were unable to take care of it .. You wonder if you really could've pulled it off. While you were thinking of it you see that there a offer on the TV about a therapist and you consider if you should go? 1) Don't take it 1) you take the offer and next day you go in for an appointment with the therapist and retieve meds for your mental illness. 1) you told yourself that it wouldn't work out and its a joke only for doctors to get money, so you turn the tv off and head to bed. On a Wednesday morning. You had a very difficult time rising out of bed and today was one of those day that you couldn't get up due feeling extremely exhausted, and your incapable of rousing yourself to get up let alone to go to work... I think its best to ... 1) call your boss that you're sick and won't come in 2) go in regardless 1) As much you know that its job and that you should go but keep fighting yourself to not go. So you grab your phone and dial your boss that you were going but he lead you to voice mail and you left the message. You hope that your boss wouldn't call back or message you but you were in to much thought to even think about it so you went back to bed. 2) Despite the your body fighting you to stay in bed, You manage to drag yourself out and go to work. You are surprised that you had the abilty to push yourself throughout the day and it you felt that you were enjoying your job today. You felt proud of yourself for having stuck it out. One sleepless night in Nicole's apartment, you were wide awake from a stressful day at work and didn't say a word to Nicole. She knew that you were in one of your moods and she didn't want to push you. As she was asleep, you still haven't explained your depression to her and you wanted to, but you were scared that she would be terrified on how messed up you are. While you were thinking she turns to you and ask you if you're awake and if everything was OK and you know you should tell her. What do you do? 1) tell her your situation 2)Tell her everything is FINE and go to sleep
were in one of your moods and your moods and she didnt want to push you. As she was asleep, you so navent explained your depression to her and you wanted . to, but you were scared that she would be terrified on how messed up you are. While you were thinking she turns to you and ask you if you're awake and if everything was OK and you know you should tell her. What do you do? 1) tell her your situation 2)Tell her everything is FINE and go to sleep 1) You eventually tell her everything that you feel trapped and that how sometimes you cant feel anything its not a feel that you can shake off. So you tell her on how you are going to Therapy. She listens to every word you say asking you how does everything work, while shes squeezes your hand asuring you that she unstands and that shes sad that you didn't tell her sooner. The feeling hits you wanted her to to say something but your scared to know what she'll say next. Thinking she'll leave but all she asks is how can she help. Thinking you to yourself you don't know and ask how can you possibly love me and she assures you that you don't need to know just know that she does. 2) You're paralyzed with the fear of her seeing what you really are, Full of insecurities and doubtful thoughts.As much you don't wanna lie and afraid of her to lose her but you open your mouth and lied that everything was OK and that she should go back to bed. You feel awfullying. As she drifts back to sleep you feel completely alone while you spend 2 hours awake hating yourself for being a coward. Couple days later, Nicole comes to you ask you to not freak out and if things are going to fast to tell her. With pause in the room she ask if we should live together. You love the thought of her living with you and the thought of sleeping and waking day and night. The thoughts of her seeing you not get up from bed, nights of medication, all the moments you look at the wall and being out of energy and being numb. Can she handle it? Will she leave? You know that she can so you.. 1) Decide to move in It was a cold Saturday afternoon, You arrived at Nicole's apartment and she wants to have a talk about something.. You began to panic thinking to yourself that has she finally had enough of you? Did the weeks with apart made her realize that shes without you. Your grip tightens to the couch as she saids her case. She feels that that both of you have been distanct from one another and that as she was going say it she begins to cry saying that she doesn't feel connected anymore and that she can't do it anymore. Your mind races unable to know what to say but you feel that she shouldn't suffer with you in her life.. You're only option is 1) let her go... 1) Ignoring all the insucirties away and doubts, you had a hard time hiding your excitement at the thought of her being around you everyday. So you answer yes lets do it! Her face light up and you cup her face in your hands and kiss her. Telling yourself that you will stop living because of your mental illness, that you will take back your life! 1) You look at Nicole's face feeling the heart break because you never meant to hurt her and you are the one who torn it up and caused her pain..You think to yourself that you can't ever be the one that she needs and there's no possible way that she will stay with you with all your emotions.. So you speaks the words that you dread to say.. That you guys should break up...Both of you were in tears as you said it i feeling devastated. Days after reality hit you hard knowing that you really hit on a down low when you lost her. You tell yourself that she'll be happy with someone better. Months have past by, In your full of light appartment, you sit down next to your partner to side in the table. As she look around on the life that you guys have together. As she turns to you and ask you? How are you days? Are you ok? You take a deep breath and say ... 1) well
1) Ignoring all the insucirties away and doubts, you had a hard time hiding your excitement at the thought of her being around you everyday. So you answer yes lets do it! Her face light up and you cup her face in your hands and kiss her. Telling yourself that you will stop living because of your mental illness, that you will take back your life! 1) You look at Nicole's face feeling the heart break because you never meant to hurt her and you are the one who torn it up and caused her pain..You think to yourself that you can't ever be the one that she needs and there's no possible way that she will stay with you with all your emotions.. So you speaks the words that you dread to say.. That you guys should break up...Both of you were in tears as you said it feeling devastated. Days after reality hit you hard knowing that you really hit on a down low when you lost her. You tell yourself that she'll be happy with someone better. Months have past by, In your full of light appartment, you sit down next to your partner to side in the table. As she look around on the life that you guys have together. As she turns to you and ask you? How are you days? Are you ok? You take a deep breath and say ... 1) well Months past, You're alone in your empty apartment. Filled with thoughts and paranoia with hearing voices in your mind.. You hear a knock on the door as you open it is your mother. As the two of you sit at the table, she goes to you and hugs you and ask you how are you doing these days? Are you ok? you take a deep breath and say. 1) well... You think to yourself and know that you won against you depression and the heavy weights lifted. At work, you been getting your work done and on time, so or later you'll be promoted or giving a rise. In your relationships, You are open to talk to your partner on whats wrong without feeling like you are a burden. You feel more movatived and alive on doing the things you love and be around those you love. As you look up to her eyes and tell her that everything great without no doubt holding you back. You think to yourself on how defeated you feel that depression to over you and how it took a toll on your relationship and work. You find yourself less interested in the things you used to do. You feel that at this point your boss will fire you for your absences and job performance. You distance yourself with your personal relationship and those who try to get close to you get afraid so you push them away and don't let them in. Pior of the events of the past months you feel extremely exhausted and deafeated and that you are not the same person more of a husk walking around. As you look up to your mother and feel her worry gazed before you drop your eyes to the floor. All you can say is that everything is ok.. if you know somone or are someone who is depressed, Talk to someone close to you and let them know what going through in your mind and ask for help. Don't hesitate to ask for help because there always someone who will care for you if you just ask for help